#ive had a lot of shit happen to me in the last few years

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Ya boi got a new medicine and a therapist.

[bmpmp3]

post ankle-twisting clarity

[sanguith]

i'm glad i decided to try out a ketosis diet again (aka changing my metabolism to basically only use ketone bodies made from fatty acids for energy by reducing carb intake to max 20g/day) for a few weeks because it was a neat experiment but i'm also glad I decided to stop because now i get to enjoy life's greatest fucking simplest yet finest delicacy: mashed potatoes/sweet potatoes with melted butter and salt. i cannot understand how i could live without that. just. vegetables. keto has opened my eyes to new ways to cook foods and experiment with ingredients but i don't think i can live without carbs. i doubt that the majority of people could. also have you any idea how much good simple near-zero effort food there is out there like holy gosh darn in heaven. i don't have to spend hours cooking something to have a nice meal

[butt-puncher]

I wish that I was more

[phagodyke]

ok moment over its all good

oh who am I fucking kidding. I'm not gonna go am I.

[devildomwriter]

One Little Thing, A Ring Part IV | Mammon x Reader

1.1K Words | GN! Reader | CW: Angst

You came home late again that night from work and were surprised to find Mammon already asleep. The past few weeks you’d been working extra hard, Mammon had stayed up for you and offered you a rose he’d stolen from a bouquet somewhere in the house. But tonight he was sprawled out under the covers and his cheek was pink and puffy.

You inspected closely without waking him up and felt the skin had liquid beneath. Using your magic you identified the perpetrator and healed his wound, draining the last bit of magic you had in you for the day.

Not bothering to change out of your old clothes you lifted the blanket and fell asleep next to Mammon.

Mammon was practically comatose but he could sense your presence and his pained face grinned as he snuggled closer to you, head on your chest.

You smiled and held onto him as you drifted into sleep.

Mammon was sad the next day to see you’d left early again. He noticed your slippers by the bedside and began to wonder if you’d actually been there or if he’d dreamed it up.

He pulled out his D.D.D. to call you but you couldn’t answer and he gave up after a few tries and sighed.

He scratched his back and stretched, trying to wake up his body before being put back to work. Despite the cheer of the holiday season, Mammon stayed occupied only with work and didn’t enjoy it as he normally did. All he could focus on was money and this time it was for a good reason. All of this was for you.

Mammon’s brothers had all learned what was happening and dealt with it in their own ways. Lucifer’s way of dealing was to occasionally ensure Mammon had more work to do but he remained at the castle a majority of the day to make sure he wasn’t worked too hard.

His brothers began to randomly appear at the castle and soon after some kind of disaster would occur that they’d never be punished for.

Eventually, Mammon caught on and he wasn’t happy. He put up with a lot of shit from them over thousands of years but he wasn’t having it and called for an intervention.

They didn’t listen to him so Lucifer forced everyone to come together and hear him out. Mammon got a pardon from work so everyone could meet up at an acceptable time of the day.

“Okay, why’d you call us here?” Leviathan asked annoyed and focusing more on his D.D.D.

Mammon growled, “Dammit, you know why. All of ya do!” He pointed his fingers at his brothers.

Asmodeus gasped and placed his hand over his chest. “I’ve done nothing wrong, how could you accuse me!”

Mammon glared at him and Satan nudged Asmo to cool it with the theatrics.

Belphegor rolled his eyes at Mammon’s declaration. “What did you expect?” He hissed, in demon form.

Beelzebub put a hand on Belphegor’s shoulder trying to ease his anger but it was palpable.

“You guys know damn well why I’m working and you’re makin’ it harder what gives!”

Satan glared at Mammon now, “as Belphie said. What did you expect?”

Mammon clenched his fists and his demon form slipped out which surprised his brothers. Mammon didn’t often lose control like the rest of them, even when they beat on him, called his names, or won their money back, Mammon would stay calm. But not now, Mammon was beyond pissed.

Lucifer remained silent, he knew what Mammon was going to say and he knew that Mammon would be right too.

“Do ya realize that by gettin’ in my way, you’re really just gettin’ in ___’s way!”

They froze in silence.

“I get that you’re all mad they didn’t date you instead! I get that cause I’d feel the exact same way! Y’know how pissed I got all those times I thought they were dating one of you! Or when they kissed Lucifer that time he got amnesia!”

Lucifer chuckled and earned hateful glares from each brother.

“Anyways, I get it! But this isn’t about me, it’s about ___! And if you really care about them then you should want them to be happy and like it or not, they’re happy with me! And I’m tryin’ to give them a ring they deserve and I’m doin’ honest work! So quit comin’ into the castle and screwing everything up! It’s not cool and you know that!”

Everyone was silent for a while and Mammon finally tucked away his wings and sat on the couch facing his brothers.

Lucifer finally spoke with a small nod. “I know.” He relented. “You’re right. All of us are making things harder on you.”

“Hey! You don’t speak for me,” Belphegor snapped but Satan shook his head.

“Give it up Belphie. We’re too obvious.” Satan looked Mammon in the eye. “Fine. We’ll stay out of your way and we’ll do it for ___ not for you.”

Asmodeus nodded and Beelzebub looked at the ground.

“But know this,” Satan continued. “I’ll be waiting for the moment you slip up and when that happens I’ll be the one by their side.”

Leviathan set his D.D.D. down and glared, “That goes for me too.”

Everyone agreed and Mammon sighed. “Whatever, that’s not gonna happen so you’re all gonna have to suck it up for ___’s sake. You really think they want you guys trying to ruin their relationship the second you can?”

Satan turned red and Beelzebub blushed in some sense of shame. They wouldn’t admit to it but they still intended to romance you any chance they could get. Similarly to Diavolo, they were hoping that after hundreds or thousands of years with Mammon, polygamy might be on the table.

Mammon knew this and stayed wary of his brothers but took solace in the fact they wouldn’t dare upset you, so his relationship was safe as long as you were happy. That scared him at the same time.

The closer Christmas got the more he panicked. Was he really good enough? Could he really make you happy forever? He couldn’t even make up his mind on a ring because everything looked so damn perfect when you wore it and he couldn’t afford to get them all.

Mammon looked at the calendar one more time before collapsing into your bed, “the twenty-third already…” he sighed and covered his face.

He was so close to eternal happiness but at the same time feared letting you down. Mammon had nightmares that night until you shook him awake.

“Huh! What’s happening!” He shouted with a start, his cheeks stained with dried tears.

“Mammon…” you said in a gentle tone and wrapped your arms around him. “You need to tell me what’s going on.”

Part I • Part II • Part III • Part V

[v-anrouge]

This is a queued post and it includes talks about transphobia and mentions of self harm and eating disorders

Im here to talk and announce a break, first thing's first j relapsed, in literally like everything sh ed and didn't try to kill myself is because of a few people and the fact my pills ended. For a very long time in this blog u have not been feeling like human, it's like most of you don't even actually like and just come talk to me when im being funny and fun or when i post something rook related that you like, ive really been trying to get rid of that feeling but it keeps on coming back and it's unbearable to be in this blog at this point. this situation with Shiba only really confirmed it for me, I saw about like 4 mutuals referring to this as drama, and complaining about seeing it on dash and while obviously you have all the rights to be displeased with a constant show of negativity in your dash, i beg of you to try and think how i, a trans man, must feel seeing you refer to me and other mutuals calling out transphobia and have to read you refer to this as drama and not as a literal crime. I understand if you got annoyed by me talking about it constantly and to that i ask that you please block me, because i have been literally beaten, bullied, harassed and even doxxed by transphobes, I do not take anything that displays even a bit of prejudice against my trans siblings lightly, hence why i was so "histerical and obsessed" and was being so "stupid and acting like an idiot" as someone people would claim. I do not care what view you have of me i really don't, im used to this shit, ive been trans and alive in the most transphobic country for 20 years, it's no news, but it still hurts. And it hurts even more when I see someone say i was an idiot for blocking someone immediately and calling them out when they side with a transphobe, and it hurts even more when I see a person i thought liked me complain about "drama still going on" rest assured that i won't be "bitching" about it any longer

For soru, who cant possibly process why i have blocked you, your take on that situation and your friend have both brought me terrible flashbacks of my own past as a child dealing with transphobia, of being told people like me are sick and are the seeds of the devil and that we are animals or that there's something wrong with us, like your friend said, their apology is both not genuine and extremely poorly made as they still can't accept the fact that yes, they are transphobic, and you soru, can't imagine how it broke my soul to see your post saying you had given them a chance, but seeing the post you made after, in which you literally agree with your mother you should've stayed away from trans people, that's what broke me the most, and j couldn't even speak about it, because it's "too negative" or im "drama chasing" im sick of this, you can hate and insult me all you want soru rest assured you're not the only one you're not the first nor the last one, maybe this will come off as a surprise to the people that are sure im obsessed with drama and chasing people around but i genuinely did have a lot of respect for you, if the hours ive spent crying over this say anything at all, it's sad that this had to end this way, but not for me, I don't care, this isn't the first or the last time this happens to me, but to my mutuals who i am very sure many are angry that i have made this situation happen, perhaps i should've stayed quiet and keep being funny as people like me best, well it is too late, but i hope that you'll forgive me mutuals, for once again ruining something good.

I don't know how long this break will last or if ill ever even return to this account at all, but i sincerely thank the ones that did treat me like a human, as an equal, that actually saw the person behind v-anrouge. you can't possibly believe how much you mean to me

That's about it, do have a great day

[hearts4youz]

The Captains Daughter: Chapter 16

A/N: finally, a chapter worth posting. This one is so much better than the last two or three i've posted. Sorry guys, I've totally lost track of time, its been two weeks since the last chapter ive posted... this is a longer one so hopefully it will suffice. Thank yall so much for reading, feedback is much appreciated :)

Taglist: @abbiesxox @n30n-j3lly @weird-katthing @kayoyamamegame @kroowonderemporium @astro-ghoul99

word count: 1.3k

Reader pov:

You and your father have silently agreed to just let go of what happened during the commute to the grocery store. The two of you have not talked about the topic since, and you were grateful for it. You headed for the doors to get outside the base, as you had decided earlier that a morning run should do the trick for your sluggish start to the day. It seems you had woken up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Barely making conversation at breakfast, feeling irritated and put off by everything. Even the sound of Gaz breathing when you sat next to him in the mess hall made you want to choke him out.

You breathed in deeply, savoring the crispy winter air as it's freezing tendrils circled your lungs. You sighed and were about to get moving when you heard a gruff noise behind you.

It was Ghost, clearing his throat.

You turned towards him, a quizzical look crossing your features.

"I've tracked you across the whole bloody base," he said, in a gravely, morning voice.

"And?" You said, annoyed. You didn't feel like talking to anyone not even your mysterious crush.

"And, a good soldier should know to watch their damn six."

"Yeah, in the field," you roll your eyes.

"Someone's pissy this morning, I thought we were on good terms now?" He chuckled

"I just... sorry- you didn't do anything wrong-" he cut you off.

"I know," he smirked.

"... just bad nights sleep I guess," you glared, finishing your sentence.

"Where are you headed?" his voice softened slightly, but his gaze still remained rigid and judgy.

"Out for a run."

"You don't mind if I join do you?"

You raised and eyebrow at his suggestion

"What? i'm not supposed to be friendly with my teammates ever?"

"I-I...no...I don't mind," you said skeptically.

The two of you took off at a quick pace, you were surprised that the lieutenant could keep up despite the skull balaclava covering his nose and mouth, as well as his large, toned build.

"You run often?" you ask.

"Mmm... when I was a kid I got in trouble a lot. I had to make a quick getaway sometimes."

"Who was chasing you... the law?"

"Eh, sometimes," he said, nonchalantly.

"Well, what kind of trouble?" you asked, not knowing whether to be concerned or intrigued.

"Dumb, teenage shit. You know, smashing windows... drinking... smoking, anything to get me out of the house really. I matured eventually."

"And now your in the military, the irony," you paused. "You know, I really wouldn't have guessed that you were so... unruly as a kid, Mister 'im so strict and tough," you laughed.

He gave a chuckle in response.

"Mhm, my teenage years were pretty lawless... probably can't say the same for you, Price's kid," he smirked.

"Ah you got me there... I did get into a little trouble though."

"Really...?"

"I dabbled with boys mostly..."

This made Simon's heart rate quicken, the thought of you with other guys, but then he reminded himself that you were a teenager at the time.

"Boys? I'm sure the captain wasn't very fond of that"

"Oh hell no... he always chased 'em away. I never could keep a boyfriend for very long. No matter how secretive I was he always found out."

Noted Ghost thought to himself.

Ghost laughs, "Yup, sounds like ol' cap."

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence for a few minutes as Ghost thinks about your love life.

"You...you don't happen to have any of those men in your life now... do you?" he asks quietly.

"I uhm....uh...well... no," You respond, a bit flustered.

"Good, otherwise i'd have to tell cap" He added, voice stronger and more confident while trying to play the question off as a joke.

You two were almost back to the base now, as you finished at the doors Ghost spoke up again as he swung the door open for you.

"It's about time for our daily training now, good timing."

You nodded as you stepped through the door into the pleasantly warm building. You walked down to the training facilities with him.

"Lets do some lifting," Ghost suggested.

You groaned in protest, dragging your feet as your lieutenant led you into the gym. You went through a few sets, bench press, curls, a few ab exercises, and finally some squats. By the time you were ready to start squatting, your body was exhausted, especially your legs considering you ran beforehand. Ghost looked at you with a slight bit of sympathy.

"Lets just do two sets of eight for this one alright Y/N?"

"Thank you, G-Ghost," you sputtered as you struggled to keep the bar level as you got into your first squat.

You wobbled, your legs quivered as you raised yourself back up into a standing postion.

One

You shook even more on the way down the second time, Ghost noticed this and left the wall he was leaning up against. He stood behind you with his hands open, ready to steady the bar if needed.

down, up

Two

By the third rep, the bar was so far away from being level on your shoulders your whole body tipped to the right. Luckily, Ghost caught you and lifted the bar off your shoulders before you could fall. He put the bar back on the rack and took a few pounds off of it while you sat down for a moment.

"If you're not okay enough to finish we can be done here," Ghost told you. His words were sympathetic but his voice was void of emotion, it was hard to gauge weather he was disappointed in your failure to finish the set or if he was concerned for you.

Ghost pov:

Goddamnit, she totally felt that.

I stood in front of Y/N while she sat down for a moment to catch her breath. I had to get the bar off of her before she hurt herself, but in the process I had pressed myself against her by accident. Which in return gave me a little problem... down there. Forever grateful to my mask for saving my ass once again, I tried to exert calmness towards Y/N while she rested. I desperately hoped that she would be done now that she was almost crushed by the weight.

"No, I'd like to finish out the set at least," she responded to my question.

"You sure? no shame in calling it quits to avoid injury," I responded in a warmer tone than before.

"Yeah, I've got it," she reassured me, more strength in her voice now.

Again, I positioned myself behind her to spot her. Only this time, a half step further back, not forgetting about my hard on. I'm not going to lie, It was tough to just stand there silently while she got her reps in. All I wanted to do was praise her, to tell her what a good job she was doing. I wanted to see her smile when I told her she did something right, I just wanted to make her happy.

"Good work," I managed to say when she got all eight reps in.

She told me goodbye and turned to leave. I watched her walk away, she took a few steps before I couldn't help myself.

"Wait!"

She turned around.

"I enjoyed running with you this morning... really- it was nice. Thank you for letting me go with you."

Her face broke into a genuine smile.

"Thank you for coming with me, it was nice to see you more informal... you know, outside of all the work stuff."

When she walked off again, I couldn't help but get all giddy and boyish. I felt like a teenager swooning over his crush at school.

fucking hell, Y/N enjoyed my company.

Reader pov:

When you left the gym and were sure that no one could see you, you damn near squealed for joy.

He liked running with me!

Ghost

My lieutenant

The guy I like

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

my fullmoon dream ended up being a somewhat dense one in a continuation of my dream timeline

There's this person, who was my friend but it ended badly, a few years ago. And i didnt really understand what happened it was very confusing to me, i didnt really have any power in the situation, it was only this past year i learned of the way all these strings were being pulled behind my back, which helped me understand why that situation occurred, why there was so much resentment directed towards me when i was trying so hard to just exist and keep the friendship simple + lighthearted. Like basically it was just sabotaged which has been kind of hard for me to accept even with finally knowing how it was sabotaged, it was all so unnecessary and i just wish i knew sooner.

over the past 2 or so years ive had a recurring dream scenario where I run into this person. i always write them on here too. Sometimes we apologize to each other, sometimes we dont really speak at all, but theres always this vibe of like, "Things are cool between us now, its Ok." And its a very relieving feeling, in the dreams. its almost exciting, like wow, we can be friends again??! The thing i find most interesting about it is that even though i lost a LOT of friends in the past few years through the same source of sabotage, this is the only person i have these dreams about. I guess we were pretty close for a while but still its interesting no one else comes up in this way.

Anyways. in the dream last night(this morning), it was kind of different... it was really emotional?? usually its never that emotional, usually we dont even say much. but in this dream today, they were crying, they were so earnestly apologetic, talking about how they regret the ways they treated me, and missed being my friend so much. And i cried too because it felt so good to hear it, i apologized for the messy ways i responded to the situation because i didnt get it at the time i thought i was going crazy.. And we were like holy shit we can finally just be friends again.. This is amazing..

as the conversation closed i woke up, i had a moment of being like woahh, that just happened, all the feelings and imagery of it cemented into my conscious mind. THEN, i fell BACK asleep, to the exact same dream!! it just continued. I went and did some other things, i got a job at this weird childrens entertainment center where i was dressed in a panda costume dancing for children. But it was the exact same setting, they were still sitting in the same spot close by, and in the dream i kept having flashes of relief thinking like "omg we're friends again i cant wait to catch up and talk more once im off work"

i feel my body woke me up from that conversation to make sure i really claearly remember that part of the dream before it continued on. I havent had a dream-wakeup-backtosamedream happen in quite a while but i always regard it as an extra significant dream when i do,... also its the full moon

i never know what to do after these dreams like do i reach out? honestly this person kind of intimidates me so i never know. Like i cAnt imagine in reality they miss being my friend that much. But they are pretty sentimental deep down, so maybe. Its just a difficult situation where I was never the one with any of the power, So it feels strange to instigate contact. Like how it happened in the dream, it would only really make sense if they said something first. Maybe these dreams are just meant to bring about some psychic closure that i'm not likely to ever receive irl. Its always very confusing to wake up from lol. I would like to feel that relief for real..

But at the end of the day im satisfied with my life and the friends I have now, so its not a big deal. Just stuff thats buried. I swear its always full moons when i dream about them lol! We have the same moon sign, in astrology, i wonder if thats something to do with it. We always had a lot of weird almost creepy synchronizations in our personalities. Oh well

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

Ooo I’ve missed you!!! This idea just came to me if it’s okay!!

Can I please request a Big brothers!Tangerine and Lemon x Younger sister!reader where when they’re on the Bullet Train, things of theirs keep disappearing, the case, their phones, wallets, etc… Turns out Y/n, a 15 year old girl had been pickpocketing the both of them, and she’s so good at it that the two expert assassins didn’t even notice until she took something bigger lol, the case hshs. Anyways, after they deal with the Prince, they come in guns blazing expecting the thief to be another assassin, not just a kid. They take her under their wing?

Y/n reminds them of a younger them? (Also she’s a foster kid like they were)

hii!! ive missed you !! and yes, ofc, always! love it, I did change the age to 17, hope that’s okay, just so it’s closer to be an adult (as I only really write adult readers) thank you for requesting, hope you like it💌

…

sneaky findings

tangerine x fem!reader x lemon (platonic)

word count: 740

✧.┊ MASTERLIST

You haven't been dealt a good hand in life, so you've had to supplement it in other ways. Your ways just so happened to be dipping into the pockets of others- literally. 

Because you were a child in the foster system, you moved around a lot. You regularly met new kids, and so you'd pick up on tips and tricks from the others- granted, most of them were illegal, but better yet, they were tricks that became a habit and what would later become the reason for your survival. 

And this brings you to today: sitting patiently on the bullet train at Tokyo station with your ticket and last 200 yen. You were in desperate need of a little extra cash, so you were hoping and counting on some good finds on your trip to Kyoto.

When the train left the station, you got up as inconspicuously as possible, avoiding attention as you sneaked down the aisles, slipping your hand into the passenger's pockets and swiftly back into your own. When you were in the connecting carriage area and safe, you would assess your findings. 

Usually, you were pretty lucky: new makes of phones, fancy watches and sometimes genuine gold bangles. So far, it wasn't so good, just a couple packs of gum and mostly empty wallets. 

You try your luck in the next carriage, immediately spotting a couple of Englishmen in designer suits up ahead. They weren't your typical target, but you had a solid feeling about these two- they were bound to have some expensive things for you to pocket and sell. 

You slowly walk down the aisle, a brochure in hand as you pretend to read through it, skimming over the page to create the illusion. Once you are sure they're busy with the other guy at the table, you slip your hand into their pockets, pulling out their wallets and phones. 

You reach the end of the carriage and stop once more to assess your findings before spotting something in the luggage area, the silver briefcase you overheard. Grabbing it as quickly as possible, you hide it in your bag, covering it with the scarf you stole from earlier today. 

After a few more snatchings, you stroll to the lounge and instantly slump into the comfy seats, kicking your feet up on the opposite chair. The area was empty, so you could finally add up your profits from today in peace. You did a lot better than you thought, especially with that promising silver case. You just had to get in there first to calculate your total earnings.

—

"Oi, you!" a voice calls out from behind, startling you.

You sink lower in your chair, hiding the exposed back of your head.

"I can still see you."

"That’s the girl?" another one says. "She's a kid?" his voice getting closer.

"You stole all our shit," the first says, walking towards you. "Think it's funny?" He snarks, pushing your feet away to sit on the opposing seat. 

"No," you shrug, pulling your findings closer to you.

"Take it easy, mate. She's only a kid."

"A kid? Lem, she stole all our shit."

"It's pretty impressive if you think about it."

"My stop is coming up," you lie, adjusting yourself to stand.

"Hm, yeah, I don't think so," the first guy shakes his head, holding his hand up. "You're gonna tell us how you knicked our stuff, then give us our shit back."

The other guy stands beside him, crossing his arms, staring you down as if to intimate you. "Nah, I'm just kidding," he laughs. "Just tryna scare you, but didn't work," he grins, nodding to his partner as he mouths something, then turning back to you. "Lemon, and this is my brother, Tangerine."

"Like the fruit? I like it." 

"That's the first," Tangerine scoffs, shaking his head. "You're a bit young to be travelling alone, aren't ya?" He asks, glancing around the empty carriage. 

"No," you shrug.

"How old are ya?" Lemon asks.

"Seventeen,"

"One sec," he says, pulling his brother aside. "We really could use the extra hands. Could you imagine how well we'd do? ... she sorta reminds me of us." 

"I can hear you," you interrupt. "Not being very quiet and assassiny."

"Zip it," Tangerine says over his shoulder. 

"What'd ya say? That a yeah?"

"Yeah, fine," Tangerine sighs, walking over to you and snatching back his phone and wallet. 

"Wanna join us?"

— — — — — — — — — — ☆ — — — — — — — — — —

tan taglist: @tangerinesgf @kpopgirlbtssvt @angel-of-new-orleans @earth-elemental18 @ashlynhasmanyhyperfixations @idontknowwhattohaveasmyuser @thewinterv @navs-bhat @ilovetangerinewithallmyheart @theredvelvetbitch @randomawesomeperson102 @lov3lypeaches7 @princess-pebbles-things @astermath @dynamitehacke @boldlyimportantface @charmedkim @fruitlovertangerine @psiiconic @bubblezuku @sporadiccherryblossom @landryslove @daenerys-supremacy @dontknownameauthor @honestly-who-even-is-this

[longhardtransitionreturns]

Author's note: This is a dark medical fetish fiction about a birth that gives the mom a massive, fatal heart attack. Baby is fine but mom's not gonna make it even though the medical team does a lot to try to save her. TW for: fatphobia, graphic birth, and unsuccessful resus. There are some mentions of bodily fluids too.

"She really didn't know she was pregnant? I've worked in medicine 20 years and still don't understand how that happens."

Judy's fellow nurse, Karen, laughed her agreement. "Well yeah, but you'll understand when you see her. She's huge. And get this: she's been having contractions for 4 days. She thought she needed to go to the bathroom."

Kayley was 24 and teetering just over 450lbs the last time she bothered to check. She also didn't bother to take her insulin or, apparently, her birth control.

She was sweaty and short of breath when the paramedics rolled her in, screaming about the pain and pressure in her belly.

"I'm not pregnant, I just need to take a shit," she complained, even as she clutched the underside of her bulbous stomach. It was a massive 70 inches of pale, roiling flab jiggling as the bariatric stretcher wheeled her into the room. She clutched at the girth near her utuerus when another contraction hit. "Oh fuck, it HURTS! I need a toilet, I'm gonna shit myself!"

"Kayley, you need to listen to me," Dr Andrews said as he swept in to take over the case. "You are pregnant and delivering. But with your weight and health history it's not safe to deliver vaginally. Your heart has been under a lot of stress because you've been in labor for a long time. I have never seen a blood pressure so high on someone who is concious. Hang tight, we're going to check you here and then get you into surgery."

Kayley cried as they cut her size 6X panties off. It took two people on each side to lift her massive tree trunk legs into the stirrups. 3 nurses set about starting the IV ports she would need during and after surgery.

Suddenly, before the doctor could even locate her opening, she let out a roar of pain. "I feel the head! I'm pushing!" She put her chins to her chest and bore down before any of the medical staff could stop her.

Things moved quickly after that. A crash cart was brought in and Dr. Andrews got the forceps off the tray. However, despite her size, Kayley was a good pusher and the head was quickly sitting just inside her entrance.

"It stings! There's so much pressure. Am I crowning? OH GOD I think I'm crowning, it's ripping me!"

Judy was up at her head, wiping her brow and whispering encouragement. Kayley laid her head back, struggling for breath. Her face had turned gray in the last few seconds. Suddenly a look of absolute agony crossed her face. Her eyes went wide with horrified recognition. She knew that pain -- she'd already had 2 heart attacks. But this was, by far, the worst pain she had ever felt.

"I'm having a heart attack. It's a bad one," she managed to gasp out. Tears ran down her face as she pawed uselessly at the pain in her chest. Her eyes were wide with shock and terror as if she'd realized these were her last moments and she was spending them in unimaginable agony. She sucked in one last gasping, moaning breath before her head fell back. Her eyes stayed open, staring sightlessly at the ceiling.

A quick thinking nurse went to aid the baby dangling between Kayley's legs as she was laid back and the work began to save her life. The first couple of hard chest compressions snapped two of Kayley's ribs but also helped pop the baby out of her in a rush of amniotic fluid, which splashed on to the floors and the fat rolls on her legs. That was soon joined by other waste as Kayley's bladder and bowels voided.

The team made a valiant effort to save the new mom's life, running full code for over forty minutes. Her huge body jiggled on the gurney as she was shocked, medicated, and pummeled in the chest. Her massive, saggy breasts were splayed to each side, their long nipples caught between her ribcage and her fat rolls. Milk squirted on to her mottled skin with every desperate punch to her sternum.

When they finally called it, Kayley was a mess. Her chest was bruised and burned and she still had a trach tube protruding from her open mouth. Judy noticed that Kayley's already ginormous stomach had swollen even larger.

"What's up with her belly?"

Karen put down the drapes she was putting away and walked over to Kayley's bloated body. She reared her right fist back and punched dead center of the blubber above the dead woman's pubis with all of her body weight. The placenta shot out from between Kayley's legs with a nasty squelching sound and settled between her massive thighs, coating her rolls with thick blood. Either the force of the punch or the brutal expulsion of the placenta caused Kayley's body to push air through her throat, which wiggled the tube and forced a groaning sound from her mouth.

Judy and Karen left the room, chatting about the marvels of the human body. No one had bothered to close Kayley's eyes. Her puffy face was forever frozen in a rictus of horror from the half a second her dying brain realized she was going to die in agony with a baby she didn't even know she was having hanging out of her twat.

[romana-after-dark]

Flightless Bird, Fat House Cat: The Wrong Way Anniversary

The Wrong Way Universe

Title taken from a song on the playlist, Flightless Bird American Mouth by Iron and Wine.

ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF WHEN I FIRST POSTED THE WRONG WAY!!!!

I could never comprehend the love I got from this series.

Due to everything happening and the targeted harassment, I can't celebrate the way I want to but I couldn't pass up an opprituniety to celebrate this story.

Three POV's, Tommy, Lorenzo and Jack. I know Jack got v little play in TWW as he was just on the side in case I needed him (and I did end up needing him!) But through talking to Clem, Mary, Kate about the universe in this last year, he also has a special place in my heart and in Stolen Lullaby, aka my reworking of this story into a dark novell, he will have more of a roll. IDK if I ever mentioned it, but his faceclaim to me is Garrett Hedlund in his most yeehaw looks.

Because of everything, reblogs are disabled because I don't want attention to this blog and I'm taking a risk posting this but I want to be brave for this story. After this, I'll be gone for a bit so check out romana_rose for updates until this is over. If you enjoyed this, please leave a commnt. I need it right now.

I can never thank you guys enough for all the love you'e given the wrong way and the sequel series, Ghost of You and Going Under. This series was so important to me to explore my own trauma, family, friendship, motherhood, fatherhood, brotherhood, siblings, found family, morality, manhood, victimhood, etc.

You are all so important to me, every like, comment, reblog ive gotten i've looked at and loved.

Here we go.

Very little Joel, but I promise we'll have more for the celebration of the finale in a few months when i hope I can celebrate properly. But, seeing as Joel is the bad guy, I thought more exploration of the side characters would be interesting.

*****************

If Tommy closed his eyes, he could imagine it was her.

Things had gotten better in the raiding house for her, even if Tommy had lost a lot of her attention. Since Zach had tried to take her away, her brother she thought was dead until that night, the girl had been… less than pleased with him. It was understandable, he knew. From her perspective, Tommy had known her only family left that hadn’t abused her was a still alive and he had kept it from her… but from Tommy’s perspective he was protecting her. She had said to him to him, the day thought fought, that the only person that can protect her from Joel, is Joel, and she was right. He couldn’t protect her if she left again. Last time she tried, strong thing she was, she was burned and humiliated.

Thing were better for her now.

Refusing to escape with Zach, which confused Lorenzo to no end, had made Joel trust her more, and now she had more freedom. She’d started cooking, which she seemed to like, and Joel had taken to finding items for her she needed. Lorenzo watched her when Tommy was busy. Jack even made her a birdfeeder, and she liked watching the birds fly in and out. Sometimes he wondered if she longed for the freedom they had. 

Flightless bird, wings clipped her whole life, subject to the whims of men. 

Sometimes he watched them too, Blue Jay’s and Robins and other kinds he didn’t know shit about. He thought next time he saw Maria, to ask if Jackson had any bird watching books… maybe the girl would like them, help pass her time. He wanted to fly away too, he wanted to leave, leave everything and take her with him… but he wasn’t a bird. He wasn’t a bird whose wings had been clipped, he didn’t have his freedom stolen away by cruel men wanting to possess and break down something less powerful than them. 

Tommy had given up his freedom to follow Joel, his brother, the only thing he had now. Tommy knew he was a cat, once a stray and free to follow his fancy but had grown complacent and comfortable and lazy. He was a fat house cat pretending to be a lion.

Instead of saving her, he was getting his dick sucked as he listened to her moan.

It wasn’t all that loud, you really had to listen to it to hear it and God… god did he listen. Tommy was sat on his chair, legs spread, Lorenzo on his knees sucking his cock. Everyone knew Lorenzo was gay, that’s why he was allowed to watch the girl. Jack, they couldn’t figure out yet. What Tommy did know is sometimes Jack and Lorenzo fooled around with each other, and after a few weeks he got in on the action. Tommy wasn’t gay, but a mouth was a mouth. Tommy couldn’t sneak out to Maria as often as he wanted and the girl wasn’t making things easier. Joel had taken to finding dresses for her and god, did she look cute. Happier too. Smiles and laughs and fresh air did him good. From what she had told him, she’d never known peace a day in her life. Between her dads physical and sexual abuse and selling her out to man after man, just letting them beat her for money… this was comparatively peaceful now that Joel had relaxed. Still, she wore that brand on her thigh, and constant reminder that his love was conditional. Tommy wasn’t sure the reminder was working.

He tried to focus on Lorenzo, his mouth taking him deeply inside… but most importantly, her voice. In the next room, Joel was fucking her and whatever he was doing it was making her go crazy. How was Tommy supposed to know what her pussy felt like and not think about it? Not remember what it was like sliding in? Not think of her beautiful smile, still gentle and tender and patient after everything she’d been through? Everytime Joel made her moan those sweet, sweet sounds he pictured it was him, and his hips buckled up a little.

He could pretend it was her pussy if he concentrated.

*

Lorenzo knew something was up.

He loved sucking dick, would rub himself through him pants until he came every time if he knew he wasn’t getting action back, and with Tommy he didn’t. Lorenzo knew Tommy was picturing a girl when he closed his eyes, that death grip on his chair so he didn’t touch Lorenzo’s head. The shaved head would throw him off, ruin the bit for him. Still, Lorenzo opened his eyes. Tommy was focused, teetering on that edge, that wide, barrel chest of his panting and panting… He really was handsome, as was Joel, the prick. If Lorenzo was in that girls position, and he wouldn’t be because he’d fucking leave, he would run away with Tommy before spending another day with Joel. What was Tommy waiting on? He had a pretty girl that clearly loved him, that he clearly loved even if he was a man whore.

Lorenzo didn’t really have room to talk, honestly.

It wasn’t like he was cheating on Zach. They weren’t dating; Lorenzo didn’t date point blank. They were just fucking. And cuddling after. And hanging out whenever they could both sneak away… So they watched shooting stars together and talked about their moms and sisters, so what? It was just sex. He was fooling himself and he knew it, but letting go of the delusion was too painful. They’d never have a normal life so what was the point.

Tommy came in his mouth, saltier than Zach but not as strong as Jack; that strong, musky taste that was so masculine Lorenzo couldn’t help but swallow down. Even subduing himself, Tommy was loud.

When he died down, that’s when Lornzo heard it.

The girl in Joel’s room, the next one over. She was moaning.

Lorenzo didn’t mind Tommy picturing a girl. He didn’t even mind that maybe he was picturing her. But something about the fact that Tommy was getting off to the sound of that girl’s moans, a private moment, a moment which although she was clearly enjoying now, had been brought about by kidnapping and violence, disgusted him. She was just a kid to him, and yeah he could be a dick but he didn’t want to think about the horrible shit she’d been through.

“You’re fucking pathetic, Tommy!” Lorenzo stood, flustered and embarrassed and fucking angry, he headed to the door.

Dumbfounded, Tommy blinked up at him. “What? You offered!”

Lorenzo whipped around, stormed back to Tommy who had stood up and stuffed his dick back into his pants and Lorenzo fisted his hand up in Tommy’s white shirt. 

“You’d rather listen to you brother fuck that terrified child than be a fucking man and take her away. You got all these excuses but the fact of the matter is Joel matters more to you than an innocent life. When she’s dead in the ground, remember this is how you spent your time.”

He was about to let go and walk away when Tommy had to open his big mouth. “I don’t see you do’n anything to help her.”

It wasn’t rational. Lorenzo really should care this much. He wasn’t supposed to be making friends or attachments, but here he was, he cared about Zach, he cared about Jack, he cared about the girl.

Lorenzo punched Tommy square in the jaw.

*

Jack found Lorenzo outside smoking a joint. He didn’t smoke weed but he pulled out his cigarette and joined him.  “What’d you do to Tommy? The girls there icing his face.” Unfortunately, Jack knew their routine. Sex, bath, sleep. When Joel carried her, wrapped up in a towel and laughing at something Joel said or falling asleep in his arms, Jack always turned away. It didn’t matter much considering he’d seen her completely nude when Joel violently took her after charring her flesh. Sometimes he swore he could still smell it. Still, he wanted to offer a bit of dignity.

Jack didn’t pretend to be a hero like Tommy, but he didn’t put on that fake asshole defense machanism Lorenzo did. He felt for the girl, he just wasn’t going to risk his skin to help her leave. So, unlike Lorenzo he didn’t tell her she was dumb for staying, and he tried to make little things for her here and there. He was working on whittling some dominos. Unlike Tommy, he didn’t promise to whisk her away. Middle ground.

Lorenzo rolled his eyes. “He’s a dick. Joel’s probably gonna clock me.”

But Jack waved him off. “I doubt it. He ain’t running to Joel to fight his battles. If he wanted you hurt, he’d’ve hit you back.”

Lorenzo sighed, but nodded and took a fat hit. “Which being logical, it’s annoying.”

Jack just chuckled. When they were done, they walk back inside the girl was icing Tommy’s face. After she’d exited the bath with Joel, cuddled up in a ratty towel, she saw Tommy exiting his room with a swollen eye and tapped Joel. Clearly he’d dressed her, and let her tend to him while he stood, arms crossed and glaring. He tried to get Tommy to tell him who did it, but Tommy insisted it was just a small beef with one of the men, but they’d handled it.

When Jack and Lorenzo entered the living room, the girl gave Lorenzo a death glare.

That child had been beaten within an inch of her life again and again and again, forced to suffer the worst thing imaginable and yet she still managed to be so uniquely her. Bravery despite it all.

Brave little bird.

*************

thank you, thank you, a million times thank you.

and thank you to everyone whose reached out in this trying time.

Tagging people who were active reachng TWW or who still talk to me about it. If you want to be tagged for the finale celebration, lmk!

If you liked, this series, Rooms on Fire has similar vibes.

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @milla-frenchy @pimosworld @miraclesabound @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @the-fox-den @lunar-ghoulie @foggymoonbanana @dinsbaby @pedge-page @koshkaj-blog @rubyfruitjungle @gogh-with-the-flow @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @justagalwhowrites

[julie-schwieters-supremacy]

life update 2 !!

hello hello i kinda forgot about tumblr for a little bit im sorry mooties honestly not a lot has been happening ive kinda js been doing nothing but its the holidays so yippee

im going back to school in 3 days so thats fun (its not) i have a coding assessment (last coding assessment yes !!) thats due ON MY BIRTHDAY which is in 2 weeks and i havent started so thats fun

i also had a science report and 6 math tasks i forgot about so i dont think my academic comeback is happening anytime soon. im doing romeo and juliet in english and decided to try and finish a 35 page booklet (ive done 11 pages and my hand hurts) because starting coding felt like too big of a task

i cleaned my room today !! and washed my hair

oh guys i cut myself bangs the other day... theyre a bit long and theyre in my eyes but hey id rather too long than too short

i bought a bunch of clothes !!!! and i got false lashes for an early birthday present and i also bought a few books which are so unsimilar to what i normally read but they are

becoming supernatural by dr. joe dispenza

different not less by chloe hayden who also plays quinni in heartbreak high !!

the body keeps the score by bessel van der kolk

ive read through a little of the second two !!

i also am in the process of making one of those tiktok cardboard sharks. im stuck on the paper mache bit where they glue napkin or whatever down. i let it dry last night and some of its coming off so i have to go redo that

life has been okay? not really but its ok im gettin through it?? i think me and someone im very very very close to are drifting apart

also is it just me or does anyone else feel like they drift away from their friends if they dont hang out with them during the holidays? because all my friends are overseas so :(

oh also i went to a really cool fair that happened like a week ago and went on 2 of the scariest rides ive ever been on in my life !! like i went upside down about 50m in the air and it was scaryyy but i love rollercoasters and other rides like that

me and my friends (looking at u @quackethh) made a satire magazine with for an english task last year are doing the second one !!! so im really excited for that cos it was funny as shit

WAIT I JUST GOT REALLY SCARED BECAUSE I HAD A DANCE REFLECTION AND ANALYSIS TASK THAT I HAD TO SUBMIT AT THE END OF THE TERM AND I THOUGHT I DIDN'T SUBMIT IT but i did so its okay

i finished one of my shifting scripts !!! im really happy about that i js need to tweak it but yeah

sorry for the long post gang :( ilya have an amazing day muah muah

[wizisbored]

Hey so I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed chapter 15 of Netherborne! Your world building is incredible and it really showed in this chapter. You write a very blunt and realistic depiction of (wow, this is weird to say) slavery. I could feel both Lydia and Jock’s quiet resignation to their fates and the new girls’ fear through the screen. Your world building really shines in the details. Something that stood out to me is when the demon who handled them asked about and then demanded that Skye get her pacemaker back. I wouldn’t have thought a demon would know—much less give a shit about—her pacemaker, but I guess so long as it helps her work…

It does make me wonder though, what happens if a captured human is too sick to work? Would they be yeeted back to the human realm, or…?

(I definitely should have said this in my comment but it didn’t occur to me at the time 😭)

ive gotten a fair few comments on my worldbuilding ability at this point and theyre always a pleasant suprise because its not something i do intentionally, or am generally even aware im doing. i just really love getting into the detail and the logic of things and it turns out people enjoy when i do that. i actually started brainstorming and writing snippets of this chapter at least two years ago, because after the amount of times slave auctions had been brought up i wanted to actually write one rather than have them just be this threatening concept, and then figured out a way it could be very helpful to the plot (that aspect will come in next chapter ;) ). on top of that im hoping it can give a kinda secondhand understanding to that aspect of emily's backstory, because i decided near the start that i will never write a flashback from her perspective. we only get the surviving character's perspective of her, hence the paragraph in this chapter where lydia wonders if her mother was this scared.

about that demon - a lot of those snippets i wrote two years ago actually didnt get used because i changed his character pretty significantly. he was originally a lot harsher and rougher, but it just felt gratuitous. he spoke like a cartoon villain rather than someone doing a job hes done a hundred times already. in the fics world slavery and slave auctions are normal and everyday, just how the system is. this demon is not an exceptionally evil villain, as far as this world's demons go. hes just some guy, because being a slaver is just kinda the baseline in this setting.

anyway, onto what you actually asked about - this demon, unlike ogrien, actually knows his stuff. hes had a lot of practice conducting what are essentially condensed basic medical exams, and hes read up on potential problems and their impact. frankly, he knows a small child with a stress-triggered heart condition is likely to not survive the auction. theres no point withholding something that could prevent that. its not so much about helping her work than it is keeping her alive long enough to sell, because hes not expecting anyone to buy her with the intention of keeping her alive long.

so that brings us to your last question and to put it frankly, they'll die. bloodsport or the large carnivorous creatures that some demons keep or a combination of both.

[jetblkhotelmirror]

frank stans, how are we feeling?

i dont want to start anything but i would like to here peoples input on this- so, if youre gonna comment, be nice to each other please lol

im assuming that even though i havent seen much on it, the people here know about the ls dunes issues and related frank issues, but, to give a very short summary- ls dunes released an ai music video and when fans (rightfully) voiced their concern about the ethical implications of this, they doubled down, got defensive, and ended up saying some really harsh, hurtful things to fans. additionally, they have allowed "ai bros" to take over their fanbase and effectively bully original fans out of online spaces using homophobic, transphobic, and misogynistic rhetoric. in the aftermath, frank made an antisemetic joke (seemingly accidentally) and fans tried to (very calmy and respectfully for the most part) inform him that it was offensive, but instead of simply apologizing and taking it down, or doing anything productive whatsoever, he got mad and started insulting fans and insisted that it was not antisemetic and that he had done nothing wrong/people couldnt "take a joke." i might be forgetting some things but, lastly, a friend and frequent photographer of ls dunes showed up to a party dressed as an ls dunes fan. his outfit consisted of a bright orange wig, and ls dunes beanie, fingerless skeleton gloves, and the ls dunes shirt with wolves on it that was designed by a fan. it was clearly an attempt to laugh at and make fun of fans, specifically girls and women in the fanbase, and, though it wasnt one of the band members wearing it, the fact that he felt that it was not only okay but also funny means that fans are likely a common , or at least not an uncommon, subject of jokes or ridicule in that circle. a lot of people are justifiably upset that a band who was initially so vocal about loving and supporting the fanbase that has loved and supported them for so many years would let this happen, especially after all of the shitty things that have done/allowed to be done to fans in the last few months

im 100% done with ls dunes at this point for a number of reasons (ai, the toxicity in the new fanbase, the bashing of the fans for expressing their concerns, this costume, etc), but im not sure how to feel about frank in all this. i know that he has had a part in all of the dunes shit, so im definitely not his number 1 fan anymore, but the other stuff like the doubling down on the antisemetic joke is still rubbing me the wrong way.

i am kind of having a hard time being objective about this because i have loved him and his music for so many years, so i was wondering if anyone here has any thoughts or input as to what theyre thinking about frank after this whole situation. i certainly dont think he is flawless, and i never have, but at this point, after everything that has happened, i feel uncomfortable continuing to "stan" him in the way that i have been, and i definitely dont feel comfortable going on as if nothing has happened. like.. ive had a frank profile picture since i got a twitter account, and same on here, but i changed it bc i dont want people to think i support some of the shit thats been going on, so i really dont know what to do here

thoughts, anyone?

[s0m3b0dy2u]

this is a vent

feel free to ignore

so, a few weeks ago i told a few friends of mine that i couldn't be friends anymore for the sake of my mental health

(this is the one thats relevant rn):

a little bit of context: this girl (we'll call her a for now) was one of my irl friends. i moved up here around 4 years ago, and she was one of my first friends. we didnt talk a lot, but we had a kind of mutual respect for each other, id like to believe. the next year or wtv though we were fighting constantly, and (slight TW)(i dont remember if she told me to kms or if she threatened to kill herself but something like that happened). after that we didnt talk for god knows how long and then we were friends again. we were decent friends until last year, when a certain other girl (lets call her a-) moved up here and instantly integrated into the friend group. the 3 of us as well as another person (j) were like best friends... except not really. i started dating a- and it all went downhill from here. around a- and j i felt totally invisible, and a was the only one that didnt make me feel like that. i voiced my concerns to a. thennnn some fucking shit happened. a- got with j and then broke up with me, i did some things that i was never and wont ever be proud of (they said i was using my mental healthy as an excuse and it was never an excuse, what i did and what i said was so shitty but yk wtv), shit talking each other back and forth etc. at the time j was dating my best friend (t) but they were together for like years i think but j was super toxic and then they broke up one day, j called t the n-word (hard r) and a- also called t a slur

slight TW:

(we're getting off topic now)

anyway, a continued being best friends with a- and then i started feeling invisible around that whole fg

i was constantly being left out, ex:

a and their friends went to the mall together when i not even weeks before proposed the idea, this kinda shit continued for nearly a year i think (it at least feels that long anyway)

they became close friends with a girl who used to be one of my best friends (m) and m was like "oh, we should hang out" (to me) but was always apparently too busy hanging out with a and a- or whatever

whenever a- was in the room i was literally invisible and i got sick of it

a and m only ever talked to me when it was convenient for them or it was just me and one of them in any given room

id already addressed this issue in the past and they didnt listen

this hurt me

i told them politely i couldnt be their friend rn for the sake of my mental health

i valued their friendship more than anything

but now im "playing the victim" and im toxic and im the asshole for genuinely putting myself first and trying to fucking heal

plus it was a personal boundary, i just cant be friends with anyone thats friends with a-

because when she's around it always goes back to there being drama

we were fine before she moved here

but now ive lost countless friends and my mental health is sinking farther with each day and i just wanna kms but i cant, theres so many reasons why i cant

and, were in highschool, word travels, of course it does

i heard that a brought up something

specifically:

at least im pretty sure this is what they were referencing

(also, this, idk if this is related tho?)

anyway

either a blew it out of proportion, or the story got blown out of proportion as it passed from ear to ear but the version i heard is not what fucking happened at all

ill be honest, the girl the person was talking about i had a crush on

i was on vc with that person when this went down

ill say, ive always been super hypersexual, i feel like thats safe to say

up until this point, my thoughts about my crush were always super respectful, to the point where i felt guilty even being in her presence like as a bystander like shes so worth the world and ill just hurt her by being around type shit

when we were having that conversation i legitimately wasnt thinking about anything, just the thought of thinking bout her that way had me red

when i tell you those were the tamest "sexual" intrusive thoughts i ever had

and i still felt so guilty

like i thought about making out with her and her kissing my neck and that was it

and i was so ashamed, im still ashamed, im not proud of myself at all i feel so small and "oh youre playing the victim again" literally gfys

theres nothing i hate more than feeling so pathetic, so why would i make myself the victim?

she (a) also said (on multiple occasions) that i didnt like several ppl in that group which is blatantly false. i never really disliked any of them (save a- and j, and now a too probably but even now saying i dislike her is too strong for what i feel)

on top of that she said im toxic which she knows is literally my biggest fear

like yeah ik im the asshole, im always in the wrong im so toxic because everyones always told me that

and to think once i felt better i was gonna try and tell her where i was coming from and why i cut her off, since i really valued her friendship

i know, though, that i dont need her around if shes gonna act like that, even if its to make herself feel better or to win the approval of others

anyway at least i got to go home early today because i had a mental breakdown about this ..・ヾ(。＞＜)シ

whats even worse is i cant talk to any of my friends about this bcs t is dear friends with a and my other friends literally would not care

if youre reading this, i love you (/p) have a great morning, day, afternoon, evening, or night